19 And the Bad News Is…
The bad news motivated the drill instructors that much more. —R. Lee Ermey
Long story, short. Delivering bad news is a matter of mastering and minimizing a moment.
The Bright (and Brief) Side of Bearing Bad News If it’s hard to give someone bad news, don’t make it harder by dragging it out.
Nobody wants to be the bearer of bad news—whether telling your boss the project is going to be late, telling your significant other you’ve bounced a check, sharing negative feedback from your most important client, or having the unfortunate responsibility of having to fire somebody. In all of these moments, taking the time to prepare and get to the core of the issue quickly will make the pill easier to swallow.
Remember, there’s almost always a silver lining. No matter how dire the situation looks, we’re never really doomed. Yet, belaboring a point will make what’s painful, unbearable.
I remember early in my career suffering a major setback in finalizing a contract with an important client. At the last moment, the client decided to cancel the agreement, saying that he didn’t really remember approving it.

Stop talking and let people process

When sharing an idea, let people take time for it to sink in. After presenting them with complex or large amounts of information, give them a moment to absorb it all. Knowing when to take a break is just as important as setting up the idea. The mind is a processor, and if you keep hitting the Send button, the effect can be maddening and futile.

I nearly panicked.
That was clearly bad news. I had to call my boss and tell him about this major setback.
My boss came to the client’s office, rectified the situation, and set the deal straight. He pulled me aside afterward and said, “Listen, kid, don’t ever let it get to you.”
What I took away from those words of encouragement was that you can deal with the problem, find a bright side, and take away some benefit.
In this chapter, we will look at how to make sure that the bad news is delivered in the most professional, respectful, and humane way—and that it never capsizes our ship.
Give It to Them Straight
John Challenger is CEO of Challenger, Gray and Christmas, a recognized leader in workplace economics, labor, and hiring. His company often counsels executives that are part of corporate downsizing. According to Challenger, in these instances, it’s easy to let tough discussions get out of hand.
The best way to terminate someone’s employment is to give that person the news straight and then get out of the picture so he or she can begin to process.
“When they hear the news, the blood rushes to their head and they just can’t think at all. Something really bad has happened to them,” Challenger said. “It is so important that it be brief. It should take 5 or 10 minutes.”
In a termination discussion, Challenger said it’s important to be frank and positive without being patronizing.
“In these situations, it’s difficult to stay in the moment, be calm, really hear the other person, their reactions, and get on their wavelength. These situations are inherently stressful,” he said. “I know people who can’t sleep the night before, who sweat out their shirts.”
Don’t give into the temptation to overexplain in order to compensate for the bad news.
“The meeting should be focused on delivering the information. The boss is not the person to give that person a lot of comfort, because he or she made the decision,” he said. “It should be done with humanity, with kindness, but it’s also easy to get caught up and try to become that person’s friend.”
Even though you might be tempted to rehash your justifications for your decision, all they will hear is that they’re not good enough.
“You don’t want it to turn into an argument,” he said. “This is not the time to go back over that kind of information or to berate the person.”

“This should be a moment for you to deliver a little advice and a strong, short message—‘You will survive.’”
“I can remember one instance where I was in the office, and all of a sudden, I heard the two people come out, screaming at each other at the top of their lungs, just in a furious argument,” he said. “They were basically marched out the door. It’s just volatile emotionally.”
Be direct. Deliver the bad news in a kind, humane, but firm way. You have to talk about the details, but it’s not a time to get into a long discussion that could lead to a stressful, unnecessary dispute.
If you have the unfortunate responsibility to fire someone, consider these three things:
• Avoid lengthy discussions.
• Keep it short. Realize that the person will need time to process after you’ve delivered the bad news; don’t try to have the person understand on the spot.
• Doors close all the time. Help those who hear bad news recognize the moment and then focus their energy on rebuilding.
Serving up the S#&$ Sandwich
Angelo is an overachiever who is always looking for what’s next. A rising star at Zebra Technologies, a growing tech firm in Chicago, he was always looking for the next career opportunity.
When a new sales manager position opened up, he was ready. But he definitely wasn’t ready for the surprise he found at the interview.

“I applied for the job and got the interview,” he said. “I thought it was a great sign and I definitely thought I was the most qualified person.”
Angelo had the interview with the vice president (VP) of sales. He called Angelo in to his office and asked him to make himself comfortable.
What happened next changed everything.
He said, “You must be a little nervous about the interview.”
“A little,” he replied.
“Well, I am going to make it easy on you. You didn’t get the job.”
Angelo was a little stunned. Before he could reply, the VP said, “Hopefully you feel more relaxed, because now you have nothing to lose.”
“Okay, I guess,” Angelo said, unsure of what was to come next.
“But what we’re going to do now is take this opportunity and get you prepared for the job,” the VP said. “Right now, you don’t have any management experience, you never formally led in a corporation, and you haven’t demonstrated you have those skills. I’m going to help you create a plan to do that.”
The conversation lasted an hour.
“It was really positive because he didn’t serve me a s#& sandwich. He was straight with me.”
A s#& sandwich is how most people deliver bad news or harsh feedback. They bury the bad news in between meaningless or downright disingenuous positive verbiage.
It goes something like this:
“You’re a strong player, and everyone loves your work ethic and attitude, blah, blah, blah. But you don’t have a clue about the project you’re working on, and the wheels are coming off. We know that you have a bright future here, and we value your commitment to the firm.”
Roger Schwarz, who wrote a Harvard Business Review blog against “the sandwich strategy,” recommends that executives take a transparent approach to help both their audience and themselves.
Delivering transparent negative feedback communicates authenticity and diminishes everyone’s anxiety.
People often get the good-bad-good-news combo. The problem with this approach is that it is confusing or even misleading. You run the risk of people missing the point, which is unfair and ineffective.
Imagine a thousand managers across a business serving up these sandwiches. Picture the organizational cost of all of those employees not knowing where they stand and what they can do to be better.
When giving tough feedback, give it to people straight. Those moments can be defining for them and for you.
When delivering feedback or bad news, consider three important issues:
• Problems: Do I state the bad news simply and clearly, not pulling punches?
• Causes: Do I state the real reasons why this is the case so people know why?
• Possibility: Can I take advantage of a tough talk to create a heart-to-heart?
It’s about having integrity. Being brief is your best bet to being honest.

What’s more, it could start a conversation that turns things around in the same way it did for Angelo. A few months later he became sales manager because he was ready; three years later he was manager of the year for the entire company
When you are clear, people hear more than what you say
The Neo-Futurists is a Chicago troupe that performs Too Much Light Makes the Baby Go Blind, which consists of 30 plays in 60 minutes, each a mix of drama, comedy, current events, and poignant pieces. Every week it changes to stay fresh and topical. They get to the heart of the message in less than 2 minutes. It’s powerful, is fun to watch, and gets the audience to enjoy much more than what’s said in each mini-performance.

Long story, short. Delivering bad news is a matter of mastering and minimizing a moment.